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26 September 2016 @ 01:13 pm
i’m a “mutual follower” of some japanese people who are learning esperanto, on twitter. they make suuuch cute mistakes. i’ll translate some:

i very to become big (=i want to become big; since a bodybuilder is saying this, they might mean “to become muscular” LOL)

i eat chocolate because i a hunger (=am hungry)

i am a hurrah to you! (=i’m cheering you on!)

it’s sooo cute ;_;; and i’ve never had a problem understanding any of them even once. even the ones that only started learning esperanto last MONTH. even though we’re on twitter, where technically you have almost no context clues. i actually don’t want them to get better and start talking like everyone else, because it’s way more exciting and fun to get that “i understood them perfectly!!” feeling…
so i’m trying to remember about this and make myself write in japanese to them sometimes too. they’re probably also thinking my wrong japanese is cute, right? gotta perservere! ;_;

today the teacher said we only have 3 weeks of class left, i knew it already but hearing it actually come from her mouth made me breath a sigh of relief... but i have to study and get ahead for the second half to the semester, which is a "new class". SIGH. i keep running into the problem where i already understand the grammar we're going over, but the class/textbook explanation is so bad it actually confuses me and messes me up.

i'm also thinking hard about writing mob psycho 100 fic, and some more devilman fic... i might also transfer my old esperanto fics from my old account on AO3 to my current one (i had problems with someone on there a while ago so i didn't transfer anything, but maybe it's safe now)
22 September 2016 @ 09:45 pm
neĝo falas kore, / snow falls in (the, my) heart
profunda silent' / a deep silence
ĉi tago denove / this day again
denove, bonven' / again, welcome
21 September 2016 @ 12:03 am

so, talking to some guy whose esperanto is, errr, “textbook” for lack of a better word. i don’t mind this at all, but what i do mind is people saying what others can and can’t say. if i can understand you, i don’t mind what you say or how you say it, no matter how many typos, grammatical errors or word-choice errors you may be making. if i don't understand some word you used i just ignore it unless absolute understanding is vital to the sentence (hint: it's usually not). i mean, i talk with japanese ladies who only started learning esperanto last month, and 40-year-old chinese policemen whose esperanto isn't much better, so i can't be picky.

but, for example, just now i said "teleparolilo" (tele - bridging long distances; parol - speech, talk; ilo - tool) for "phone". as a comparision, the standard word for TV is "televidilo" (vid - view, see), for remote control is i believe "teleregilo" (reg - rule).

this guy goes basically, "do you mean telefono? tele isn't an esperanto word".

oh? it's not? despite that it appears in those words above, as well as in words like "telegram, telegraph" etc? despite that "fono" means as in "phonic" (to be honest, i still only connect that to Hooked On Phonics)? despite that esperanto is meant for simple, easy communication?

you know, i JUST today saw a post about how there's like 10 different ways to say "hobby" in esperanto ("like-occupation, side-occupation, my little pony" are just 3 options). i myself have come up with like 20 (mildly) different ways to say "bus stop". i come up with words all the time, because that's what this language is for, it's a LEGO-language where you piece together words via building blocks according to need. the other day i wrote "tedonunto" (person who would be giving tea) because i needed to actually say it, y'know?! at other times i've written much funnier/stranger words... i can't think of any of them right now but the last one someone didn't understand was "mordido - bite-offspring", which i was using to poetically mean indent marks on a table from rats biting it.

(btw i don't think that people always need to understand what you're writing in fiction/poetry/song lyrics. even if they think they understand, their view of your work is way different from your own anyway)

early on when first learning esperanto, i said "fire-mountain" for "volcano". one english-native guy asked what that meant and said had to say volcano instead. the thing is, i have studied around 10 different languages to a greater or lesser degree and "fire-mountain" is the way to say volcano in every single one of them - except modern english, which says "volcano". where does volcan come from? hmm, how about Vulcan, the god of fire? i could maybe understand his confusion, except we had already been talking about volcanic eruptions, i didn't mention fire-mountains out of nowhere!

when you begin learning esperanto, everyone says there's so few words blah blah. but this is not true when, basically, coming from anyone who knows english or french well. these people are so stupid they don't even know what a blog is, so instead of saying "online diary, online journal, writing-space, place for memories", whatever, they decide they need to borrow an entirely new word - "blog". meanwhile they push out everyone who comes from some other, more remote mother tongue - like the chinese and japanese people, who have almost no words in common with english/french so they can't just see "telefono" and go "ah, a telephone!", they have to learn every single word on top of having extra struggles with the grammar. it makes me mad that people are so inconsiderate.

anyway. i have never told anyone, stop using those words. i've always broken up words for people when they asked what something meant (tele-parol-ilo). i usually ask my wife (either before or afterwards) if she can understand the word i made up, and she doesn't even know esperanto so if SHE understands it, it should be perfectly fine. yet i get people telling ME to stop using MY words.

this really annoys me, because i'm ALREADY watering down my esperanto so everyone who follows me can understand it more easily. when i write to myself, i don't use english-like word order or word construction, but i do so on twitter because it's what most people use. esperanto's original intent was 1. use few words, use logical words, 2. be vague and understand based on context instead, 3. if someone understands you, you're correct no matter how may grammar or pronunciation rules you break. except, apparently a ton of modern people have such a lack of reading comprehension that they can't understand even that.

17 September 2016 @ 10:24 pm
wrote and posed a fanfic after FOREVER! though it's not exactly great quality, and it's only around 300 words, it came out surprisingly easy.

i got paid $15 for giving someone a faroese lesson and i'm working on a japanese lesson that'll go to a couple people... i also levelled up in singing thanks to the singing weekend our club had (over the course of the weekend i noticed i got better and better at certain notes), but who knows if i fell back down already.

i also started watching a japanese drama series, it's the 3rd i've tried (this one is about foreigners learning japanese so it teaches some good stuff at least). it's not that great but what's shocking is how it's JUST LIKE ANIME AND MANGA. i mean, bad anime and manga. they even have characters falling down randomly. i had kinda thought that their manga and their RL stuff was separate but i guess not.

i'm still going back and forth when it comes to schoolwork. can i even manage the second half of this semester? not at this rate, i don't think. we're already halfway through the first half and i've gotten behind in homework. it's really just a problem of, like always, feeling so stressed at home that i don't want to do anything - on top of feeling so discouraged in general that i don't want to study, even though i'm studying japanese which i do really love... sigh. i wish i could just get a job in japan and move there!

i also got an invitation to a group interview for "praktik" (=unpaid internsip) at Media Markt, some electronics store. But it's a 5-hour meeting, even if I get the "job" (which is unlikely) it's still unpaid, and they even want me to bring a police report to ensure that I'm not a former criminal. Except, they say on their paper it normally takes 4-5 days to get the report in the mail but the police website says it normally takes two weeks. And they didn't even send out this invite 2 weeks in advance. i just feel like... screw everyone!! just gimme a job and don't interview me along with 30 other people!
08 September 2016 @ 10:49 pm
what the heck? LJ updaited something so the "view using old design layout" option in my account settings was unchecked. i thought the site was suddenly thinking i was using a mobile phone...

in other news, i'm making a LOT of japanese acquaintances through twitter lately. it seems a lot of twitter esperanto people are japanese... or because i'm posting anime screenshots they think it's funny, i don't know...

i found a PDF of natsume souseki's "kokoro" in the original spelling, it's actually nott as hard to read as i thought. i know the meanings of more kanji than i thought ---- the older version has more kanji than the modern so it's easier to read!
08 September 2016 @ 05:32 pm

— i like learning, i like talking to people, but i don't think i like SCHOOL anymore. i'm tired of being corrected all the time. i'm tired of working twice as hard in class because i can't read well compared to everyone else blah blah. it's mostly this stupid house, i know. i feel like, hey, i'll do my homework now - oh no i can't, because there's too much sun + no curtains, the light in my room is broken, it's too noisy, whatever. so school is actually way more difficult than it should be. today i spent hours trying to find stuff on my class' website because so little fits on my screen i can barely navigate. i just get so frustrated...

— unemployment office says i definitely see badly enough for them to help me, but first i need to get a VERY thorough check of my eyes done, and specifically ask the eye doctor about if i can get "sunglasses contacts" (tinted contacts), and specifically have them check my peripheral vision. they also say i should get reading glasses. if i can get contacts then the office will pay for them. they can also pay for a GPS and things for me.

apparently, the unemployment office for the blind/deaf is totally separate for the normal disabilities office. these guys only care about how to help you at work. those guys only care about how to help you at home. so they have different criteria and possibilities it seems.

— I REALLY NEED A JOB. i have to finish this crap that will earn me money. same problem as always though - i get so drained from all the shit going on in this house, all the trouble with school, that i just don't want to do anything, i just want to read comics and watch anime, or otherwise avoid all responsibilities...

23 August 2016 @ 06:44 am

managed to get registered for, and log into, my japanese class. the class is full-time studies, starts in around a week from now and runs for half the semester. then i have another class just like it to cover the second half of the semester. it's a gruelling pace (you're supposed to study 40hrs a week... minimum), and of course my house isn't the best study/homework environment, so i studied during the summer to try and get ahead........ and fell behind in that studying.

class 1: chapters 13-18, ends in october. 6 weeks of class, 2 of break.

class 2: 19-23, ends in december (i think). since i don't have syllabus for this one yet i can't say for sure.

we learn 1 chapter a week, meaning 2-5 grammar pieces, 100-200 words and 15 kanji (pronunciations/writing method) per week. that's a lot of work, and if you ever get behind you're totally screwed. the teachers are pretty lenient when it comes to messing up the grammar but for some reason they assume you've perfectly memorized the vocabulary....

i've currently "memorized" (=learned on memrise, not sure about memorized) up to the beginning of chapter 18. so if i can finish chapter 18 this week, then i have the entire first half of the semester to cement the vocabulary while desperately also trying to memorize the vocabulary for the second half of the semester.

...and then comes spring semester, using a completely different book (which luckily i bought years ago and also have a scanned copy of). from what i can assume based on the spring semester textbook, that class is going to be mostly vocabulary/kanji memorization. the book is really just a ton of reading practise, preparing you to be able to read japanese history textbooks and newspaper articles and stuff like that. and i have no idea how fast it's going to go.

anyway... i'm gonna be busy for a while... if i work all day and get a good routine going, i can actually "memorize" a chapter's worth of vocabulary in 3 days. however creating the "flashcards" for memorization takes way longer than actually memorizing the words, and it's hassle that other people don't have to do because they're just using courses other people have made. i translate all my stuff into esperanto (a more precise, and closer to japanese, language than english - i did a ton of tests and i get on average 90% correct when recalling from esperanto, but 70% from english, after the same amount of time since the initial learning has passed) so it means i have to look up all the words and plug them into the flashcard course myself.
21 August 2016 @ 11:31 pm
my comp had been eating up disk space for no reason for a while, well i ran iMovie and it killed the last i had left, so i moved some files to my wife's computer, it was still crazily eating space, so i went to repair the disk. "you can't repair this disk while logged in, do a special restart and try it".

the special restart both couldn't fix the disk AND suddenly made the computer realize it's totaly dead. so now i can't log in and access my files and crap, because the computer dies upon trying to make a normal start-up. now i'm using our windows computer but it's extremely hard for me to use because the size of all the text and everything is so small (among other things, i had an 800x600 resolution and a ton of add-ons on my own computer). and i really have to get at least my files off the other one, because i had a lot of imporotant stuff on there... like the almost-finished swedish textbook, and my almost-finished tool for teaching myself kanji.

school also starts in just a week from now. i already use another computer for lectures since the lecture platform doesn't work on mine, but i normally do a LOT of studying on my own computer.... i don't have the money to fix the computer (as in, I have like $40) so i hope my wife's parents will help pay or something.... and of course i had no backups of any of the important stuff.
20 August 2016 @ 02:50 am

i'm been having a lot of trouble with mentally ill people over the past few years. recently it seems like i've been having trouble with almost everyone i even talk to. know why?

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19 August 2016 @ 04:36 pm

i've discovered that home-made kefir (made from milk) = a powerfull sleeping drug. if you drink like, a full glass all at once, you'll NEED to go sleep. apparently this is normal because it's full of something-or-other and is a natural tranquilizer. not only that, i feel like my eye muscles are getting "more elastic".

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